Ramblings of my goings-on

One of my older sisters invited me to grab some coffee and go for a walk so we could catch up last week. Our schedules haven't aligned much lately and now that we don't have our Thursday coffee dates I jumped at the chance despite having a french press already steeping on my counter. I opened up to her about the recent improvements I was making when it came to running. One of the things I love most about her is she can see things in ways I cannot.

"It's probably because you are no longer struggling day-to-day like you were a year ago. Now instead of going for a run as an vital part of destressing, you get to choose to run just for fun."

Although I have long realized how much running has been a huge source of therapy throughout my divorce and although I constantly tell people "I run for fun," I never put those pieces together with my running improvement. I started adding up different elements in my life that suddenly were making sense to the bigger picture. Not too long ago my younger sister talked me into a certain activity that shall go unnamed. I was actually excited about something other than running for a change! After roughly a month there was an ultimatum that I inadvertently prompted. If I wanted the fun to continue, I needed to devote a significant chunk of my babysitting resources for the next 4-5 months. If you are a single parent, you know full well how desperately essential it is to your social life to not to tax out your babysitting resources. Unfortunately, but not regrettably, I balked.

And not too long after I had this run.

Let me explain this to all of those who don't know me. This was huge!!!! Every single marathon I have run has involved some sort of walking break. The longest I can recall running without a walking break is 14, maybe 16 miles. I've never been strong after 15 so to run that far with no walk break was unseen by me before. I felt I could have gone much longer too had it not been I had a limited time to run before picking up my daughter. The second component to note of this run was that it was at a sub-9:00 pace. This is not a pace I am familiar with maintaining beyond 8 miles. Add these two together with no GI issues, minimal muscle soreness, and no post-run headache and you've got yourself a breakthrough.

I've spent a long time analyzing changes that have happened (beyond my sister's) so I could keep on course. The two main changes I can attribute are (1) consistently training and (2) nutrition.

Consistency 

I completely changed my data entry business so that I can have two guaranteed solo quality runs a week. If I was going to get faster I simply had to have some non-stroller runs. No doubt stroller running has made me stronger, especially now that my girl is approximately 30 pounds, but if I was serious about going after a marathon PR I needed to commit. I'm paying dearly for that commitment but I'm very fortunate for the job I have which allows me the income for it. My daughter fully enjoying the socialization at daycare is an added bonus. I've had days where she cries, kicks and screams when it's time to go home which is the surest sign of the right daycare for your child, or so I've been told. Dependable child care is something I did not have for the first 1.5 years of my daughter's life, and it has made a world of difference, for both of us.

Nutrition

A couple of months ago I decided it was time for a diet tweaking and went with the following changes.

Maca powder: For women's health reasons and reported energy boosts. I found it disgusting to smell and almost non-consumable at first. Its unique flavor profile overpowered anything I tried adding it to but with consistent use the flavor has since become undetectable and the smell no longer repulsing. Makes you want to try it, right? I use it in my daily afternoon smoothie.

Hemp protein powder: For protein (obviously!). Initially I started using this as a partial flour substitute in baked goods but now use it in my daily afternoon smoothie. This has been a marvelous addition since dairy/whey protein and egg protein disagree with me.

Local honey: For allergies and immunity boost. This isn't a new addition but I now take it daily instead of when I think I'm coming down with something. For the first time in years I have not suffered Spring allergies (knock on wood).

Lentils: For digestive health and protein. I am still a flexitarian and don't plan on giving up red meat as pescetarians do. What can I say? I crave beef after a long run. Long ago I swapped ground turkey for ground beef. Now I'm swapping out ground turkey for lentils. By far my favorite swap out as been for tacos but this soup sealed the deal for consuming lentils on a regular basis.

This past Sunday I decided on some more tweaking. I'm now going to attempt adding lucuma powder, carob powder, and mulberries. Eliminating all sources of carrageenan is taking a top priority which will start with committing to making 100% of the nut milk we consume.

The latest recipes that really trip my trigger: Cool-aid, chickpea blondies, and baked cinnamon apples (using coconut butter and serving like a cereal with nut milk).

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First Dance with Trail Demons: Oriflamme 50K

It's been just over a week since I ran my first ultramarathon. I hesistate to call myself an ultramarathoner though until I finish my first 50 mile run. My prep for this was shameful, and my body paid the price. I ignored a 5-pound weight drop in the week leading up to the run mainly because my milk supply never seemed to suffer so it didn't seem to warrant serious thought. My daughter was getting plenty of milk, and I was able to leave plenty of milk behind for while I was gone. I was letting stressors from my personal life ruin my appetite though, and I'm certain I was dehydrated before even setting foot out in the Laguna Mountain range. Not to mention since my last long run of 15 miles 6 weeks prior to this run I basically stopped running (jokingly referring to this as an "extended taper"). Thank goodness running amnesia takes place so quickly because I sure as heck felt like I was a failure during this run and yet here today I'm fantasizing about 50 mile and 100 mile runs! 

Carrying on with my run recap...here we go!

Total Distance: 31.4 miles

Time: 8:01:06
Elevation Gain: some 4700 feet (taken from a running companion's GPS summary)

Starting Temperature: 31° F

Ending Temperature: 64° F

Quote of the Day: “I'm still moving forward, right?” AND "The pain is only temporary."

Pre-run Consumption

·         Steel cut oats with coconut-almond milk and 1/2 banana

·         Coffee with coconut-almond milk 

·         Mayesa, Cacao Mint

Run Consumption

·         ½ Honey Stinger Waffle, Vanilla

·         ¼ banana

·         ½ Honey Stinger Waffle, Vanilla

·         ¼ banana

·         Mayesa, Cacao Original

·         ½ Honey Stinger Waffle, Honey

·         Mayesa, Cacao Mint 

·         Some coke and a handful of plain chips

·         Approximately 160 oz water

·         12+ Metasalt Capsules

Immediate Post-run Consumption

·         2 slices of pizza

·         Slice of chocolate cake

·         Fritos

·         1½ bottles of Peroni

·         ½ coke 

Sunrise

After arriving at the Sunset Trail Head I quickly went to register at the start line, changed into my gear, and dashed back to the starting line. No standing around for me as they were already counting down upon my approach - 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1! I didn't even have my pack strapped on yet as I headed out on my first 50K journey. On the single track the gentleman I was nestled behind unnerved me a bit. It was dark when we started, and my knuckle light was shining right behind his path lighting his ankles just enough for me to see him roll them three times. We hadn't even gone one mile. I made it a point to pass him at the S1 crossing.

The single track to the jeep trail was familiar from my preview run and that was pretty comforting. Every other race I have ever run has started off on completely new ground for me. I found a comfortable cruise and took only quick glimpses of the sunrise. Nothing beats a sunrise over the mountains. The sun was heating things up quickly. Thankfully the bite in the air was waning. Running through heat pockets in between bushes was a wonderful sensation. I've run through pockets like these before but not to this degree. After a quick pass through the first aid station I made my way down the rocky jeep trail. I struck up a conversation with a man (blasted I can't recall his name) who was an ultrarunning veteran. In fact, he ran this very course the day it was canceled due to the winter storm a few weeks prior. I was in awe as he described the wicked conditions and how that did not deter him. He was also experienced running the PCT50 so I picked his brain about his strategy to conquer it. I would be a fool not to take his words to heart, especially considering how this run would end up.

At the bottom - didn't make it this far on the preview run

I started struggling on the course at the bottom of Oriflamme Canyon. My legs were not tuned in to sand running. Anytime I do a beach run I avoid the soft sand and skirt along until I touch something firmer so running on soft desert track killed me. I. Hate. Soft. Sand. But I couldn't blame the sand when others so easily floated past me. Tie together the soft sand with the false flat and this quickly turned into a power struggle. I was exerting an awful lot of energy trying to navigate the sand. I pressed on though because at the time it didn't feel that tough. My ignorance was shining far too brightly to worry about it any further.

First time running on desert terrain

Breezing through the second aid station only to empty my shoes (I need to get some Dirty Girl Gaiters!) I entered Box Canyon. I had to stop for a moment to take in the beauty of it.

Box Canyon

At 15.7 miles in I reached the turnaround point. I had to avoid looking at the family and friends waiting for their runner well aware that my daughter would not be in the small gathering. Other than missing her I was feeling super fantastic. I had no clue that I would not be able to run the distance back.

Halfway mark

Running the soft sand down was easy-peasy at first. I returned to the second aid station and emptied my shoes again while graciously letting someone refill my water. Shortly after taking off I ran into some Dirt Devils, complained about the sand, then pressed on. Not even a half mile later, somewhere between mile 18 and 19 I think, I went from cocky to humble in a second flat. My muscles crapped out on me with a sudden DERP! I've only had minor muscle cramps during runs that did nothing more than threaten my pace so when my whole lower body shut down I was completely stunned. I kept walking knowing full well if I just stood there I would be in more trouble. I slapped at my leg muscles. I had no idea muscles could get that hard. The amusement quickly faded though as the pain crept through every muscle fiber. I kept walking forward even though the muscle seizure was relentless. I slammed more water and completely ignored my salt pills at this point. To be honest I can't remember the last time I took any. I rubbed my aching lower back and was taken aback by how damp my back was under the camel back, totally oblivious to the fact that the desert was wicking away my sweat before I could register that I was in fact sweating like a mad woman. 

So oblivious. So terribly oblivious to what was happening. 

I started to sink into a deep hole. I questioned everything about my training. I questioned why I thought I could handle something so immense. I questioned why didn't I just freakin' walk from the beginning. Then I questioned the one thing I did not want to think about during the race...I questioned why my marriage failed. To ruminate on this topic left me feeling horribly defeated. There was nothing left to fix, nothing to gain from thinking about it and yet it plagued my mind. I kept telling myself shut up, shut up, SHUT UP! I was totally consumed in thought but at least I could still will myself forward.

I started the ascent and let my pace dwindle to barely moving, pushing through the pain as fast as my body allowed. Somewhere during the death march a lady passed by and asked how I was holding up just like everyone else that was passing me (people really look out for you on trail runs). I was choking back tears while trying to convince her I was fine. She was not fooled. I assured her I really was fine. She offered ginger chews. She was so kind. I again assured her it wasn't my stomach or anything, it was these darn mental demons in my head. She smiled and said it probably wasn't all mental as we were walking up a wall at this point and with that she continued on leaving me behind with my demons. 

Demons? What the heck was I referring to when I sputtered that out? I suppose I had many demons that day, many challenges to face. For instance, the pain demon kept trying to get me to quit, to surrender, but I kept pushing. At one point I welcomed the demon of physical pain because it was more bearable to deal with that then that stubborn demon that reminded me of my failed marriage. Physical pain is only temporary after all. 

Shortly after hitting the home stretch my muscles gloriously relaxed (I swear it was the combination of Coke and salty potato chips that saved me!). I even felt like I could run and did so for maybe 3/4 mile until deciding to walk most of the way. 

It all came to an end at 31.4 miles in 8:01:06. I foolishly forgot sunscreen (very reminiscent of a Christmas Eve bike ride with friends in Africa in which I ended up utterly fried - when will I learn?). Other than the sunburn I actually felt pretty good afterwards.  Boiling it down the Oriflamme 50K was really a supported training run, one in which I learned a lot from. I have just under a month before my first 50 mile trail run. Ready to take it on!

Back home nursing my 14-month-old

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Oriflamme Preview Run

I am now a believer in preview runs! My confidence is through the roof for the Oriflamme 50K. I am ready to tackle it.

On with the run recap!

Total Distance: 20 miles

Elevation Gain: 3627 feet

Average Pace: 14:23

Starting Temperature: 41° F

Ending Temperature: 52° F

Quote of the Day: “It hurts so good!”

Pre-run Consumption

·         Fruity Cheerios with almond milk

·         Starbucks Caramel Macchiato, grande

·         Mayesa, Cacao Original

Run Consumption

·         64 oz water

·         10 Metasalt Capsules

·         Quaker Chewy Bar, Oatmeal Raisin

·         Quaker Chewy Bar, Dark Chocolate Cherry

·         Mayesa, Cacao Mint

Immediate Post-run Consumption

·         8 oz water

·         ½ of a Honey Stinger Waffle, Vanilla

·         Dos Equis

                                               

The morning started off less than ideal. My daughter was not interested in dream feeding so I had to pump. Of course none of my boobie pump parts were clean so I had to clean those suckers up. There’s 5 minutes gone. Then my letdown was being more than stubborn so my usual 5 minute pump took close to 15 minutes. Drag! There was no way I was gonna hook up with my running group at SDRI before they left. Still in PJs I grabbed my gear (smartly tossing it all in a bag the night before) and started the over one hour drive to Anza-Borrego State Park. A Starbucks stop was in order…another 10 minutes wasted. By the time I got to the Sunset Trailhead the rest of the Dirt Devils were chomping at the bit to go. I ducked behind my truck and changed out of my PJs into my running gear (sans technical socks – drat!) in the crisp 40-degree air. I was hurriedly cramming my trail goodies into my backpack as most of the Dirt Devils took off. Two guys stayed behind to help me catch up to the pack. I had never run this trail so I am incredibly thankful for them.

At about 2 miles one of the girls took a stumble that ended her run that day. The timing was unfortunately fortunate as there was only a half mile or so shortcut back to the cars. Alternating shoulder carrying and piggybacking four of us helped her along the single track back. Hobbling back on her own could have caused further injury so we were more than happily obliged to assist her. I believe she is okay although I don’t know the extent of her injury.

Back on track now and ready to get grooving we entered the overgrown brush. Lesson: Get a good trail description before heading out. I wore my Moeben technical dress with compression shorts and my bare legs got scratched up over the next few miles. It took a good mental block to ignore the increasing intensity of the scratches. I blissfully ignored the fact that I would have to run through the same brush on the way back.

A much needed jeep trail section was next. One other Dirt Devil was keeping the same pace as me and was game for hitting 20 miles that day even though the others were doing 17 miles. The miles down toward the desert floor went by rapidly thanks to great conversation. It was refreshing talking to someone who shared the same attachment parenting values that I held. On the way down we passed the leader group heading back up and quickly were forewarned about the “death march”. Wonderful. We kept running only stopping for a photo op when the view was too beautiful to pass. We passed the 8.5 mile turn-a-round and kept going to 10. The desert floor was so close and incredibly tempting to run down and touch but I wanted to finish this run in good form. I don’t want to exhaust myself on training runs. My goal for each training run is to be able to feel like I can run another 10% of the miles I just did. Turns out that my new running buddy’s longest run before today was 16 miles so we agreed it would be best that the desert would have to wait for another day.

My left toenail was now bothering me a tad from the beating it took coming down. Lesson: Trim toenails before hitting the trails. Pain aside we turned around to start the death march. More parental talk and me spewing about my depressing Peace Corps experience had made the death march somewhat more bearable.

Conquering the death march was a great feeling but knowing that I had to pass through the brush again…not so much. We opted for a little stretch out first. My hamstrings were pretty stiff and took a couple minutes to relax. At the start of my run I could touch the ground with my full palms.

I pushed through the thorns and no lie, it hurt. Between my thorn aversion, walking the ups, my partner’s calf cramps, and a few stumbles over roots with now heavy feet the last 5 miles took one and a half hours to finish. Could we have pressed it? Sure but neither of us wanted to feel crummy the rest of the day. There came a point though where we entered a sharp switchback and we stopped and stood there wondering how could the trail just end like this. Turned around and (derp!) there it was heading clear the other way. Lacid had finally made her appearance and apparently she is related to Elmer Fudd – I vewy much wuv wunning! Huh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh!

Now, as far as any breastfeeding concerns I have, I pushed the limit on this run and will have to pump for any distance longer. I really should have pumped before driving home but I didn’t think to bring my electric pump. Instead I opted for a nursing vacation the rest of the day. I felt noticeably less “full” but my daughter reversed cycled that day with no problem and the day after I feel "full" again.  Although I don’t like using it I bought a manual pump that fits in my backpack so I can pump at the turn-around during the race. Maybe I can find a way to have someone bring my electric pump to the race aid station.

Overall it was a great run and I want to run it one more time in mid-February and touch the desert floor. As I said before, after running directly on the Oriflamme course my confidence has spiked. I know what the worst section is and I can handle it. The portion I didn’t cover is a little bit more death march and flat desert and totally doable. This will be great!

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